WO-E-MAN

TISSI GERMAN

WO-E-MAN

Your heavens open

down climbs the sooty winged
hands around the silver rope,
naked beneath her spiderweb robe
and barefoot.

Sounds of other wings
and a song only a mother could love
they are nesting in coarse curly hair,
fluttering about with sticks and moss,
croaking a song about fire and earth

like a halo crossing burning lips
while feet dance a path through rainsoaked soil.

And so I exist

in truth and in the present.
Trees bending over rocks are
translating secrets of depths in lakes
teaching me the ancient language of living

Fed by earth and the rains
I grow
fire in hands held high above head.

Walk on.
Adapt and remember not but this

How born and where is of no importance.

Crow crown in grass and I spin
circle by circle after circle and circle
the web shimmering around me
as moonsparkle or silvery rain
while Day plays his evening waltz.
Wings spread, hair thrown back
and the lake gasps

or is it you

I see you not
sense only the love your eyes make
in the gossipy whispers of the bushes
and the meaning looks
in the eyecorners of the dusk.........

***
Ice eyed and strong
your magic blows in over mine
like the wind blows over the earth,
pulls up clouds of sand from beneath my feet
and lets me dance
like a ballerina of star stuff
or light of moon

am I
as light
and as shimmering
as dust of gold

tickle your hand.

Already you know
as well as I,
you could whisper my secret name
try forgetting
breathe it into mine or another's ear

past your lips it still will force itself
and storm out of your heart

I am not largely grown
yet not small
I put my foot down and your world quakes,

like that sunkiss
whose body was once twisted
between my thighs.

Drank skin, I did,
like the most shameless of all harlots
touched, with noisy fingertips
a soul that was once quiet.

He grew warm
eventually
worshipped me through all the ages of one breath.

Easy.
Like so.
Do as you like.

You can attempt escape
run all the way to the outskirt of the borderless
and wish to never come home,
if I throw my webs
you can but shine...

The other world
harsh and cold
skyscrapes filled with questions and smart replies.

Are you the one to discipline me?
Are you the one to teach me to be
neither one or the other?

I was not made by man alone.
I live my life with the red soil and the snake
I warm by the lion, wear nests of crow and keep my head high
not to crush the eggs

don't try disciplining me
chase not
and wish not to catch
let me put my own foot in your trap.

Here.
Music for your foot:

taptap taptap taptap

and all of Eden will listen.

I hear
a drum
a rain
a wounded animals escape through the snow

you hear
the ticking of a clock
a dripping fosse
a mans slow walk through a woman

still
the rhythm is the same as
the beating of the great Heart.

***
Honest attempts.

Tiptoe into darkened room just to hear your nostrils shiver
have I once again brought the smell of softening leafs?

I know you see my efforts to be neither
or less than exactly what you want;
a woman without any marks of
yesterdays laughters
on my shawl covered neck.
One sip of sweetness
and your eyes play the same melody
as a sunbeam in the winter.

Red berries, flowers, rainsongs and old yellowed leafs
fall from the nests and out of my hair.
You sigh while I shake my robe

mess your floor.

You wish for a woman of the modern world
one to dress up
in fancy gowns and fake eyelashes
I long for home
to wolfsong and Mothers arms
spider tales and choir of thunder.

My bare feet
wound;

you are bleeding.

***

Fallen.

Language of humans,
I do not understand tonight,
translate.

I sign:
carry me
I am tired and my body is numb.
This evening
I have danced barefoot on shattered glass
phone cord wrapped around my neck
you will not succeed to make me laugh

I have tears in one hand
the corpse of a grey kitten in the other
my head emptier than last years dove reeds.

Stumble on threshold.
Silent prayer for kisses
no reply.
Run home.
There for you to seek
taste my language.
Not long 'til you come.

So,
I ask,
whose smell is the stranger here?
You insist on belonging
with the Others

Liar, my spirit screams,
liar.
I wish you death
I wish you rebirth into Truth....

***
Remember you how we first met
how you found me dancing at the edge of the seas?
Long had you walked alone
long had you wished
me
her

someone.

As you lost all hope I appeared
descended from the skies
crowned by the soot wings
humming.

Tree whispers above your head
giggling flowers beneath your feet,
how touched you me not with surprise in crystal blue eyes
trembling hands and moistened lips,
how played we not in the gardens,
intoxicated by chastity,
bellies full of fresh fruit and sweet words.

You laid me down, on back!, but touched me not.
Did you not know, even then, that there had to come another
created for you of water and wind.

And remember you now not what happened
or not
in the later?
Many were the ways of frightening you
with all of my untamed being,
not what you had expected but real
of flesh and blood
of fire and soil.
Now you cry
you woe
and condemn.
I cannot put spells of silence on the whole of the World
for you to be heard.

Say me, tried I not, for you and for peace
to close my heart to red berries and leafs
forget the taste and sounds
of lips on lips and skin on skin?
Must you blame me now
while forgetting how I cried for your hands,
how I silenced my being to better suit yours?
I was so young, so yours and untouched by others,
the owners marks that now cover my back and shoulders
were yet not carved and would so have remained,
it was you
and no other who threw me out to
Elsewhere!
Closed I not my eyes when rushing past the mirrors
hoping for us both that the scars would fade into forgetting?
It did not happen.
No.

For he stormed on
struck me harder than famine and earthquakes
poured himself upon and into me.

Your hands
too seldom and too respectfully
placed on my body
still marks there
as from harshly pressed thumbs.
Other shoulder down over spine
and you fall into jealousy
following the pictures of the wild man with your eye.

Your eye
his claw
my skin

trinity?

Am I
as burning and as brilliant
as the flame that sparkles
his eye?

Never will I forget that day when I washed my hair in the river.
He bent over the water from the other side of the border
and we met as reflections in a mirror.
I lifted my head and the same water dripped on both.

He did not run.
Nor did he cover me with coolness or harsh words,
he remained seated studying me long.

Crow crown on his head, red berries and rain songs.
When he gave me his hand, when he said

Come

I did not hesitate.

The storm he brought tore the roof off
our wellmade home,
pulled the trees up by the roots,
blew through everything that was I
and threw it around so it landed both here and there.
The rest he offered, came morning, was a wind
gently bending the leaf tops
in July dawn.

Those were his ways.
He was the rain my soil drank after ages of drought.

And I, the willful, the untaimable
with sooth on cheeks and nests in hair
found myself by the mirror
lipstick in hand and marks on throat as from a leash or a tail.
It only lasted for the lifetime of a breath
but left scars as beautiful
as tattoos of colourful butterflies
on my shoulders and back.

You cry
you woe
and condemn,
I carry my jewels through the days of my life
admire them by my broken mirror
prance about and show them to all
as was I a peacock struck by vanity.

So.
Turn your back
there will be another
made only for you by water and air.
She will be owned
laid on back and touched
filled with your silence and calm.
Walk away
walk out from the middle
greet her when she comes
with surprise in blue eyes and moistened lips.

Once
you told me
you belong with the others
I see now
that you spoke the truth.

In my world
there is nothing but heat
a Universe filled by
curiosity and the wish to play.

Shall I discipline you
shall I teach you to be
neither one or the other?

Neither you were created
by man alone
but live your life by forgetting
you warm by tradition
and hold your head high for appearance.

Seek I to discipline you?
I chase not and wish not to catch
I clearly see
You put the noose around yourself.

You name me Bitch
thinking you strike me to the ground.
By all means, I say,
of course and naturally!

The Bitch, my dear,
is laid when she wants
as the lioness takes her mates neckbite
when she wants
as the Wolfess will rip your throat
when she wants,
I will be owned
if I want.

Look around.
See my sisters and my daughters
we all live by this.

Listen.

There is a monologue whispered
through millenia after millenia;

you have seen me walk in your leash
from Goddess and Mother
to Beast and Whore
watched me live and die
with one foot in each world.
You sought to discipline me
into slavery and silence
tried teaching me your right and your wrong,
whipped me
into compliancy
and burned all my wisdom to ashes

yet
I stand here
before your eyes
filling you
with equal portions
love and fear.

Watch my spirit grow
out of any my body,
my juices taste of blood
I know
but that same blood holds the beginning
of your life.

See your wife, Man
see your sister and your daughter
risen from the oceans
risen from the air
from the centre of the earth
with the fire to your hearth;
All am I
and you can never separate us
I am woven into your tales and your dreams.

For I am
the first divinity
the last of the elders
the only mother of all mothers
I carry birth and life and death in my hand

my name is Woman
husband dearest
my name is the Sun
the Moon
the Earth
my name is the Fire
that warms your hand.
For I am
Nightwarmeress
Dayswarmeress
Appleteaseress
Mindtwisteress

I was born, or not so, by your rib or by myself
from the light of Moon and from the Love that rose
from Nothing and All.

I am
the Wife and the Mistress
the shadow in your background
the tempteress by the gates of your temple
I gave birth to you and to your sons
your fathers mother also am I.
See here
see me

I am the Goddess
born once again
I am the Maiden
called once more
from me comes the first drop
of all drops ever dripping

I am the Goddess
born again
I am the Mother
called once more
from me sprouts the first
of all lives ever lived

I am the Goddess
born again
I am the Crone
called once more
in me lies the wisdom from the times
before time began.

I am the light